Chaos

So we signed a contract on our house last night! Our counter offer was accepted. It was a surprise and caught me off guard because we had not heard from her in a couple weeks. If all goes well and the stars are aligned we will be moving May 30! Crazy to think of.

I would be more excited if a) there was not a divorce contingency on the contract till May 1st...meaning if her divorce does not go through as she expects by then...she will most likely back out at that point and b) if I had not misquoted our payoff amount which now means that we need to figure out a way to make the numbers come out right.

NO we are not making money on our home. YES this sucks. Yes we are the lucky folks who ended up loosing money on the whole "investment". A recession combined with a buyers market, rolling our closing costs into the loan (which inflates the loan obviously) & only living in the house for 2.5 years has us scrambling to just break even! HO HUM. I try not to think about it. Its just disgusting. However we have greatly enjoyed our time in the house and will always remember it fondly. We are NOT jumping into another home purchase however. I am presently lusting to rent...oh the irresponsibility of it!

So although we did sign a contract and it is starting to feel like we are going to indeed move...there is still so much up in the air that it is hard to feel settled. I'm honestly thinking about getting a prescription for something to take the edge off. I hate to go that route...but damn.....I am stressed out here.

The logistics of moving have me wired. When to my notice in at work..to be fair to my fabulous boss and yet not before things are looking solid. How to move, when to move, where to move (well we have the city but I mean actual structure). How to pay for it all.

Then of course there are the emotional elements...saying goodbye to this place I love and the people I adore. Uprooting Grant from his beloved school and friends. Moving is one of the most stressful experience you can have (loosing a child is the first). Finding my way in a new city.

In the middle of all the chaos I am preparing to apply for a job that has not officially been advertised yet but I know is coming. I want it sort of....but not really. I just feel like I have to apply because it fits me and it is actually available. If I don't get it I will be fine with staying at home with Grant!!!!! So you see my dilemma. Poor is fine by me. I remember it well from my twenties.

So as you can see....my life is chaotic right now....and I do not do well in these moments. So send me a prayer or a virtual hug please. I just needed to vent!