mommy brain

whenever i hear news about something wonderful or tragic happening to someone....i immediately think of their parents...or their mother specifically...and how she must feel. now that i am a parent, i function on a different level....a different plane..on all levels - emotional, physical & spiritual. i am somehow connected to all the mothers who have ever existed. the joy and pain associated with growing & tending another soul is enormous, huge, gigantic; bigger than anything else i have ever experience...or most likely ever will.

of course, i have always been a highly emotional person. i have been feeling others pain since i can remember. whether it was my brothers or my parents, then my friends and then as a teenager the burden of the world was upon me! even still, i must censor my movie intake, because of the sheer stress of experiencing the characters tribulations! i know thats rediculous...but its difficult for me to separate from the piece. i suppose i am emtionally raw or something.

today i grief for the local mother who lost her only daughter last night in a drunk driving accident. the 19 year old was close to home...and driving safely when another crashed into her. how can a mother survive such a loss? it can be done...it must be done...but notheless HOW? my own mother has survived the death of her first born son - my brother Gary. she is such an example of strength & endurance. im still in awe of her...as she continues to live voraciously... & as she continues to grieve...while a piece of her is missing on this earth.

here is a toast to all the mamas out there....our joys, our aches..are essentially one ...the love of a mother.